Let’s Talk About: Gay Sex Myths & Misconceptions

2000px-Gay_flag.svgOn a day like today, we have to get into some gay stuff. Surely, the sex lives of all the gay people who can now marry isn’t really any of our business, but I figured now is a good time to clear up some questions that people seem to ask me all the time. I’m not sure why people feel it’s alright to ask such bold questions about the details of the gay sex life, but hey, awareness is key and I’m hear to shed some light on the inter workings of the queer bedroom. 

Scissors? Butts? What the heck is going on in there? Well, pretty much the same things going on everywhere else. When there’s parts and people “missing”, it’s maybe hard to understand what goes on when you put sex between two people of the same gender through the hetero-normative filter. However, there is no such thing as “conventional” or “normal” sex. There shouldn’t be at least. Gay sex doesn’t go against the grain and blow whatever society thinks of as “normal sex” out of the water. Gay sex is sex, too. Sometimes there’s just a little more creativity.

Despite what porn or television might teach us, not many lesbians are scissoring away, and not all gay men are having anal sex exclusively. Do straight people bone in the same position each time? No way, that’s boring. Gays are just like any people having sex; they try new things, new toys, they find what they like. Sex works the same way across the board. But it is funny to hear what some people think is really going on in there.

1. There’s always a top and a bottom. Lies. This maybe goes more for sex between two men than it does for women, but people seem to think that gay people usually have a concrete roll they play in sex; One is on top always, and one is on the bottom always. Sure, many partners may fall into a routine of who is more dominant and who is more submissive, but that’s not saying that can’t change or that it’s the case for every couple. That’s also going along with another giant myth about all sex that sex must have some one penetrating and someone being penetrated. Absolutely not true. Funtoys_vibrators_byfunfactory612. Toys, toys, toys. There’s a big misconception that gay people use an abundance of toys in order to achieve what might be deemed as “normal sex”. Nope. Sure, some couples might love to use toys, maybe it’s what both partners prefer. But plenty of couples don’t use or hardly use toys in their sex lives, because it certainly isn’t necessary to achieve the goal.

3. All Lesbians love oral sex, do it all the time, and are really good at it. Sigh. This is also very much untrue. Sure, some couples might adore oral sex, and do it every time they play. But there are others who might not like it, or like to do it frequently. It’s not the one and only sexual activity that women enjoy with each other. Which reminds me of something else…

4. Scissoring. I’m not sure where this whole thing came from. People seem to think that this scissoring is the main course for lesbian sex, the way that lesbians truly get it on. Just no. I’m not part of a particularly booming lesbian community, but the lesbians I know right this off completely. That’s not saying that some gay women out there might love it and do it all the time, I’m positive that they exist. But scissoring is not everyone’s definition of sex, it’s not the main act that we lead up to, it’s just something else to try that you might like. While I’m at it, not all lesbians are vegetarians, love cats, and stay emotionally involved with all of their exes. Maybe just some. condom-banana

5. Gay people can’t officially “go all the way”. Ugh. This bothers me the most. This goes back to that idea of “normal” or conventional” sex. A lot of people seem to think that gay people can’t achieve real sex because they can’t stick a penis in vagina. Surely, that is not happening, but that doesn’t mean gay people are not having sex. There are so many definitions of sex, all that differ within a relationship, not just an orientation. Don’t worry, gay people are certainly having lots of sex, and they’ll call what they’re doing whatever they’d like.

 

So, there you have it, Fangirls. Gay myths; debunked!

 

 

 

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